Skip to main content

"Weather", "Tchaikovsky," "Ligeti," and "Gorecki":This Fucking Guy goes On About the Weather, and a Few Composers He Happens to Fucking Like

You know,
If I had had
Any fucking idea
What the temperature was
Before I motherfucking left for work
I would have brought my fucking bike helmet
And rode down here.
I feel like I really fucking missed out.

But I can't blame the motherfucking weather
I should have fucking checked the fucking weather
Then I would have fucking known

Ok, I just checked the weather
It's like 6, maybe 7 degrees Celsius
Colder than I fucking thought
If I had seen that before I left,
I would've been like, "Fuck that,
That's too motherfucking cold."

But it wouldn't have fucking been
It would have been a really nice motherfucking time
So what the fuck?
What the fuck should I have fucking done?

Yes, 'tis the fucking season
When I fucking find myself
Listening to a lot of Tchaikovsky

Now, I like that motherfucker
There are so many nice fucking tunes
In the motherfucking Nutcracker
That it blows my motherfucking mind
Every fucking time

I don't actually know that much about Tchaikovsky
I've maybe heard a tenth of the shit he's composed

I'd like to hear more. Fuck yes, I'd like to hear more.

But there's so much out there I'd like to heart more of,
And then there's all the fucking movies,
And apparently there's some good fucking television happening
All this other fucking shit

It's fucking wild how much fucking shit there is.
But I do hope I get to more Tchaikovsky

Now this motherfucker, Ligeti
Let  me fucking tell you:
I love that motherfucker.
I was like in my 20's, and I said to Charles
(He played the fucking cello on They and Failure),

"This crazy fucking music in 2001--do you know what that is?"
(I figured he would know--fucking Juliard and shit).
And he was like, "Fuck yes"
(Charles did not say "Fuck yes"--he was like, "Fuck yes."
I've drawn this fucking distinction before. Ad fucking nauseam.
A lot of TFG is ad fucking nauseam.)

Charles was like, "That's Ligeti."
And I was like, "Oh. Okay. Ligeti."
I got a bunch of CDs, and fuck me,
I fucking love this guy.

Shortly after Eyes Wide Shut came out
I saw this motherfucking comedian
I don't remember who the fuck it was
Making fun of the music in it
Which was also Ligeti
And I wanted to kill this ignorant motherfucker

Anyway, I'm not thinking about Ligeti
Because Tchaikovsky reminds me of Ligeti
He fucking doesn't. Not at all.
It's because last Wednesday,
I finally got to see Ligeti's Requiem
Performed live.
And before you fucking say to me,
"How the fuck can you say
You're such a big fucking fan of Ligeti
And you haven't even ever heard the Requiem live?"
And you would have a point,
Except for the fact that
This was the first time the Requiem
Had ever been performed in New York.
And I'm not one of those motherfuckers
Who travels to other fucking cities
Just to hear music
I've never fucking heard.

Maybe one day, I'll be one of those motherfuckers
But not today.

And no, I didn't go see 2001 with live orchestra last year
For several reasons:
The main reason was: the money I saved not buying that ticket
Bought me the ticket to the Requiem,
And tickets to six more fucking  American Symphony Orchestra concerts.
And the other reason is that it was in Avery Fisher Fucking Hall
It's a shit room.
That's no fucking secret.

Although I love Ligeti so much
That when the Philharmonic did Le Grand Macabre
A few fucking years ago
I was on that shit like white on fucking rice,
Even though it was in Avery Fucking Fisher.
Now that is fucking love.

Ok, now I'm on a roll,
So I'd like to give a shout out
To motherfucking Gorecki,
About whom all I know
is the Symphony of Sorrowful Songs
That is some of the saddest fucking music
Anybody ever fucking wrote

There have been some beautiful songs of sorrow:
Man of Constant Sorrow, would be an obvious one
And Hank Williams has wrote a motherfucking bunch
And there's all that fucking blues music.

But fuck me: Symphony of Sorrowful Songs
That shit is beautiful
And so fucking sad.
I think I'm going to listen to that shit right now.
Because I really don't fucking feel like
Writing about Mozart now.
Maybe another time.
Maybe I'll write about Bach
After I see the motherfucking Brandenburgs
Tomorrow fucking night.


Popular posts from this blog

"Points": This Fuckin' Guy Gets Some Fucking Points.


As those of you motherfuckers
Who were reading This Fuckin' Blog last year
(Or who heard this)
Already fucking know,
I like Citibike:
I used to have to buy motherfucking monthly transit cards
From the motherfucking MTA
Every motherfucking month
And I fucking hate the motherfucking MTA.

Citibike has saved me a shitload of money
That would otherwise go to the pieces of shit
At the fucking MTA
So yeah, I fucking like Citibike.

If I had to name the worst fucking thing
About Citibike
I guess I'd say that sometimes
There's no fucking bikes
And you have to walk to another fucking docking station
And sometimes
There's no room to dock your bike
So you have to ride to another station to dock your fucking bike
But that's really no big deal
It's only occasionally a pain in the ass.

But, so then, I get an email from Citibike a couple of  months ago,
About this new fucking program
Where you get points
If you take a fucking bike from a too-full fucking station
And/or i…

Dan West: This Fucking Guy Celebrates A Friendship

So this fucking morning,
I get one of these fucking messages from Facebook,
Telling me I'm celebrating
Three fucking years of friendship
Between me and Dan Fucking West.

There’s a little fucking video thing.
I've never looked at one of these fucking Facebook videos before.
It's kind of fucking stupid,
But it brought back some nice fucking memories.
I really fucking like Dan West.
He is one awesome motherfucking motherfucker - 
I'm fucking serious like a motherfucking heart attack.

But at the end of the fucking video,
It says something like,
"There are billions of fucking friendships out there,
But only one like yours
(Meaning mine and Dan West's).
That's fucking awesome."

I'm not sure why that is fucking awesome.
You could say that every fucking friendship
Is fucking unique.
Is that awesome?
I don't fucking know.
Maybe it is.
No two fucking snowflakes, am I right?
Of course I'm fucking right.

I guess it would be fucked
If there were two f…

"Return" and "Trump I": This Fuckin' Guy Comes Back.


It's been a long fucking time.
I'm not all that into me, but I've kind of fucking missed me.

After writing something like a hundred fucking poems in 14 months,
This Fuckin' Guy was getting fucking repetitive and pedestrian and boring.
To me, at least.
And I don't think I was the only fucking one.

But, now that 14 more months have gone by (17, actually)
And what with the state of the motherfucking union,
It feels like there might be a place again
For This Fuckin' Guy.

Let's see....

February 28, 2017

Trump I* (In Seven Parts)

Well, yeah, of course.
Fuck this fucking piece of shit
Fuck this piece of shit in his fucking dick
With a fucking corkscrew
Stick a fucking corkscrew in his dick
And screw it in.
Fucking piece of shit.
Fuck this fucking motherfucker.

I've been trying to transcend
I've been meditating and being all like
Live and let live
But then this ever changing world in which we live in
Made me give in and cry
And say fuck that shit
Live and let this mo…