Skip to main content

"Return" and "Trump I": This Fuckin' Guy Comes Back.

Return

It's been a long fucking time.
I'm not all that into me, but I've kind of fucking missed me.


After writing something like a hundred fucking poems in 14 months,
This Fuckin' Guy was getting fucking repetitive and pedestrian and boring.
To me, at least.
And I don't think I was the only fucking one.


But, now that 14 more months have gone by (17, actually)
And what with the state of the motherfucking union,
It feels like there might be a place again
For This Fuckin' Guy.


Let's see....

February 28, 2017


Trump I* (In Seven Parts)

I
Well, yeah, of course.
Fuck this fucking piece of shit
Fuck this piece of shit in his fucking dick
With a fucking corkscrew
Stick a fucking corkscrew in his dick
And screw it in.

Hard.
Fucking piece of shit.
Fuck this fucking motherfucker.


II
I've been trying to transcend
I've been meditating and being all like
Live and let live
But then this ever changing world in which we live in
Made me give in and cry

And say fuck that shit
Live and let this motherfucking piece of shit die.


III
I'm not fucking interested
In making a reasoned argument
About the fucking efficacy
Of this piece of shit's presidency

I'm sure it will be really fucking efficacious:
It's way fucking easier to fuck shit up
Than to make shit better


They will fuck shit up, take the fucking money
And fucking run
That's what they do

I'm not saying the Democrats are much fucking better
I'm just saying they're not as fucking bad


IV
She was right
When she said deplorables


I mean, I'm sure from the point of view
Of the fucking deplorables,
I'm the one who is fucking deplorable.
That's fine: I'll be deplorable too.
I don't give a fuck.


But if you think any of this shit is okay.
Then fuck you
Go fuck yourself
In the dick
With a corkscrew.


V
Fuck me, I fucking hate political poetry
I believe in preaching to the converted
I believe it's worthwhile
But it's so fucking boring

So fucking boring
So fucking motherfucking motherfucking boring

Fucking boring

But fuck me
I'm still not finished.


VI
Do you like the way that piece of shit Bush
Looks good now?
Are you looking forward to how bad
The next fucking piece of shit Republican president is going to be?
Because you know he's going to make Trump look good.


VII
Alright, I've run out of steam
I'm done for now


But this motherfucker is giving a speech tonight
So I may be back tomorrow.


February 28, 2017

*"Trump I" because I figure there will be more of these. Maybe a lot fucking more.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Points": This Fuckin' Guy Gets Some Fucking Points.

Points As those of you motherfuckers Who were reading This Fuckin' Blog last year (Or who heard this ) Already fucking know, I like Citibike: I used to have to buy motherfucking monthly transit cards From the motherfucking MTA Every motherfucking month And I fucking hate the motherfucking MTA. Citibike has saved me a shitload of money That would otherwise go to the pieces of shit At the fucking MTA So yeah, I fucking like Citibike. If I had to name the worst fucking thing About Citibike I guess I'd say that sometimes There's no fucking bikes And you have to walk to another fucking docking station And sometimes There's no room to dock your bike So you have to ride to another station to dock your fucking bike But that's really no big deal It's only occasionally a pain in the ass. But, so then, I get an email from Citibike a couple of  months ago, About this new fucking program Where you get points If you take a fucking bike from a to

"Trump II: Speech" and "Retrospect": This Fuckin' Guy Reflects.

Trump II: Speech* Jesus fucking cocks How do you like the balls on this motherfucking piece of shit? Make the bar so fucking low That that shit looks statesmanlike? That that shit looks good? Fuck that shit And fuck you. But I will say one fucking thing: It's a fucking shame that no Democrat since probably LBJ Would even fucking think of proposing A trillion fucking dollars on infrastructure And I will say fuck yes to that. I will give credit when credit is due Like what that piece of shit Bush did in Africa: A lot of fucking money to fight AIDS, malaria, and other fucked up shit over there Whereas that fuck Reagan took five fucking years to even say the fucking word "AIDS." That piece of shit ratbastard fuck. So fuck yes to Bush fighting AIDS, malaria, and other fucked up shit in Africa And fuck yes to proposing a trillion dollars for infrastructure Even if it never fucking happ‎ens It's a nice fucking gesture It's a lovely fucking gestu‎re So fuck yes I

"Loss."

Loss Two fucking years ago A month or two after Citibike fucking started up I was like, fucking hell, I hardly ever ride the fucking subway anymore So I stopped getting the monthly fucking unlimited fucking Metrocard And got a pay per fucking ride And I hardly ever fucking paid for a fucking subway ride: For fucking months I'd get on a fucking bike each morning And I'd be like, hey I'm fucking saving money And after a couple of months, Let me fucking tell you, I was the fastest motherfucking Citbike riding motherfucker On the motherfucking bike path Along the fucking Hudson Going south in the morning. Not the fastest fucking bike rider -- There were always some fucking Lycrafucks Who would pass my ass (see " Bike "; the second to last Motherfucking poem I wrote on August 30th of last fucking year; Or hear "Bike,"  here ; I think it's the second fucking track). But never fucking ever did a motherfucker on another Citibike Ever f