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Another Three This Fuckin' Guy Poems: Pier, Sonnet, and Privilege

Pier
Here I am again, on the fucking pier
I mean, check out this beautiful fucking pier
During the day, it's sunny, but the breeze is so fucking refreshing, right?
And when the sun sets over New Jersey
You'd almost forget that it's New Jersey
I mean, no offense, but come on.
New Jersey is no fucking New York, I'm sorry.

And then, at night, when the waters of the motherfucking Hudson
Reflect all the fucking lights from all the fucking buildings
And when there's a big fucking moon
I can just sit on this bench
And relax
And shoot motherfucking joggers all night long
That would be a really nice time

I realize I've fucking said this before
So, fuck you: I guess I'll try to say something else now.
8/29/2014


Sonnets
You know what I fucking like sometimes?
Fucking sonnets
It is really fucking fun to write sonnets
I swear to fucking God, it's really nice

You wouldn't necessarily think so
You might think that writing a sonnet would be a pain in the dick
But it really isn't.
It's really fucking nice.
Iambic fucking pentameter
I really fucking love that shit sometimes

And filling out the lines to make a fucking A-B-B-A rhyming scheme
It's kind of like doing a fucking crossword puzzle, only better
Because there's more than one fucking answer
Sometimes it's fucking nice to be constrained
You know what I mean?

It's kind of like as if the Muse
Is tying you up
But you want her to do it
So it's kind of hot, right?

So, I'm going to try to write a fucking sonnet
Right now
Or maybe tomorrow
I don't fucking know
8/29/2014


Privilege
I am so fucking lucky that I'm white
Advantages that can't be overstated
It's fucking true, it cannot be debated
Unless you want to motherfucking fight

You want to argue with me? Well that's fine
You're white an male and straight-you're just like me
How fucking stupid are you not to see
Your knapsack's full of privilege just like mine?

Are you so fucking stupid you can't see
This fucking patriarchal paradigm
This world was built for us, you fucking slime
This shit's been fucking proven, Q.E.D

You want to fucking tell me I'm not right?
I'll fuck you up, you asshole, day or night
8/29/2014

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