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Two Full Poems, and Part of a Third, by This Fucking Guy: Dragonfly, Dachsund, and Daisy

"This Fucking Guy" is an idea I've been kicking around with a friend for a few weeks. These are the first of his poems, all written today (8/5). The third is incomplete, because it's a bit fucked up. But I will read it in its entirety on Friday (8/8/14) if anyone asks -- or maybe even if no one does.

What the fuck is wrong with you, dragonfly?
The way you dart and dip like some insane dipshit
Like you've been drinking all fucking night
Like someone dropped a hammer on your head from the fourth or fifth fucking floor or some shit
Seriously, you are one fucked up bird of a bug.
Get the fuck out of here.

Look at this funny fucking dog
But I like it, though
Fucking wiener dog
Like a flaccid fucking dick with four legs wobbling around looking for pussy
Silly fucking dog

Dachshund, so that's German, right?
No, wasn't going to mention the war, I'm just saying
You're a funny fucking German dick shaped dog
That's all.
I'm just saying.

Daisy [excerpt]
You are a pretty fucking flower, daisy
Like a real girly girl of a flower, kinda thing
I mean, most flowers are girly I guess
but you're so smiley and so sweet.

I don't normally go for such happy, pretty flowers
But you're hot Daisy.
You are really fucking hot.



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